


Same Damn Place With a Different Year

by HuntressFirefall



Series: Finding Love In These Scars [1]
Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Injury, Fix-It, Gun Violence, M/M, Post-Canon, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-07
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-05-19 03:58:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14866179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HuntressFirefall/pseuds/HuntressFirefall
Summary: As Eiji finally lays the past to rest, something unexpected happens.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: If you have not read the Banana Fish manga yet or intend to watch the anime adaptation and do NOT want to be spoiled on a VERY pivotal plot point, DO NOT READ THIS STORY.
> 
> Full disclosure: I have read the Banana Fish manga exactly one time in full, with spot-reads of other parts I needed as reference for this one-shot that nonetheless really wanted to happen. My knowledge of New York City's layout is also non-existent, so apologies in advance for any inaccuracies.
> 
> This story's events are set after the end of the "Garden of Light" epilogue.

 

“The last of the guests have left, Mr. Okumura. I've locked up. Take your time, my shift has just started so I'll be here to let you out without setting off the alarms.”

“Thank you. I'll just be a bit longer.”

The security guard turned and left the exhibit rooms with a soft smile across his face. Somehow, the fact that the young photographer was so devoted to making certain everything was in its place and liked to 'pay his respects' to the subjects of his photos before leaving for the night was endearing. It had been this way since a special set of photos had begun to be added to the exhibit a month prior, and would likely continue until it closed – whenever that would be, as the gallery kept extending the run.

Each week, Eiji Okumura had begun to add more photos to the collection on display, bringing those who had already visited his exhibit at the gallery back for another look. Everyone was intrigued about the story that was unfolding with the new pieces, that featured a subject seen in a photo he'd added to the original exhibit just before its opening night. The beautiful, stoic, blond teenage male subject seemed to have no name other than “A”, and that alone was enough to be intriguing. But the story each photo he'd added since told without a single word was what had the collective photography world waiting for the next pieces to be revealed, and reviewers and gallery patrons alike couldn't get enough.

The original portrait of the mysterious A, simply titled “Dawn”, had spawned countless theories about who the person had been and their relationship to Eiji. That first photo had turned out to be the middle of the story, as those slowly revealed thereafter had seemed to go back in time. Even though they were taken within the span of only about three years each one saw the enigmatic subject seem to grow older, aged in some way beyond the mere physical. Even when he seemed relaxed, he was wary, never appearing to be completely at ease. Once the halfway point had been reached, the photos taken after “Dawn” saw the subject seeming to draw within at times even while he was vulnerable, appearing to bear the weight of the world despite his young age.

Whenever he was interviewed Eiji was evasive on the subject, almost a bit sad even though he also seemed to be more comfortable displaying the story unfolding with each reveal. His perplexing demeanor whenever he discussed A was only supplemented that much more by the narrative the portraits had taken – especially with the final set that had been unveiled just that day. There was something resolute about A's eyes in the photos, as if some finality had come to bear.

When he was asked if he knew where A was in the present day, Eiji would only say that he was at peace. No amount of prodding, gentle or otherwise, would get him to expound further.

Eiji had begun his nightly ritual, one that had only come to pass after he'd begun revealing subsequent photos of A. Once the security guard was gone he began at the very first one, taken that first day he'd walked into the domain of Ash and his gang. He continued to walk slowly down the wall, stopping at each enlarged photograph, eyes tracing the lines of the young man that, in another time and place, could have been a celebrity, a model, a rock star, a scientific genius, political leader – and yet, had still been all of those things but outside of the consciousness of the rest of the world, in a place where the acclaim and rewards for such things had been hollow at best.

Eiji had known, even back then, that keeping his camera close was important. He'd slipped out for film whenever he could, and had used the last roll to take the final four photos that had been hung on the gallery walls that morning. As he looked them over, the memories filled in the gaps between the sleek black lacquered frames the images filled, bringing them to life.

That final day, the last time they'd had a few moments to breathe. Just mere hours later, Eiji found himself near death and his last, hazy vision of Ash that assured Eiji he was okay before the world went black would be the last time he'd ever see the other half of his soul alive.

_It was like you knew, wasn't it,_ Eiji thought to himself.  _You knew you would leave, for my safety. And you knew you'd die without us ever meeting again. That was what you wanted, whether I agreed or not._

He felt the tears again, as always. Years of delayed grief had found him unable to stave them off. The nightly ritual of saying goodbye, something he'd needed to do since the day he'd received _that_ phone call, had begun the process toward much-needed healing.

“The wound in my soul that was left when I gave you half of it, is healing now,” Eiji said softly to the piercing green eyes in the last photo, the one that hung just before the doorway that led to the rest of the suite of exhibit rooms. “But it is that part of my soul will always be with you just as I promised. And someday, I'll see you again.”

“You just might make good on that promise before you expect to.”

Eiji was certain he was hallucinating; after all, he was exhausted, and the last few weeks had been emotionally draining. The voice, the one he'd never forget, had sounded far too clear, too _real_. Thinking it was the security guard having come to check on him and his mind playing tricks as the man spoke, Eiji turned around toward what he thought he'd heard.

On the other side of the room, directly across from the final photo was the first. The portraits hung around three sides, “Dawn” in its place in the middle of the back wall opposite the doorway. In front of that photo stood a man about six feet tall, a long, blond braid falling from the back of his head to his waist over the deep brown trench coat, streaked with silver.

“Who are you? How did you get in here? How did you get past security?” Eiji asked, body tensing, eyes daring to avert for half a second to the doorway to make sure he had a clear pathway to run, just as someone else had always done, long ago.

The man turned slowly to reveal a face creased with deep lines despite the fact that he seemed to be close to the same age as Eiji. A slow smile curled the sharply-lined corners of his mouth, deep green eyes sparkling in the cold wash of the overhead track lighting.

“Do you really need to ask that?”

Eiji's heart began to pound so hard he thought it would burst from his chest. He felt light-headed but tried to keep his composure just in case this was some kind of sick joke. He finally willed his mouth to open, to ask the question he was sure sounded like the most ridiculous thing he would ever ask.

“...ah...A... _Ash?_ ”

The man's face broke into a grin, eyes crinkling up behind the lenses of gold wire-rimmed glasses.

Eiji still wasn't sure, even now. He stayed aware of the doorway as he forced the next question out of his mouth despite it only having one word.

“...How?”

  
  


  
  


**Seven Years Earlier**

“The fuck?”

Sing Soo-Ling stopped dead in his tracks as he heard the gunshot ring out from somewhere behind him, back toward the library. Something had made him walk slowly, made him want to stay vigilant, after finding Ash and giving him Eiji's letter. He'd still been entertaining the thought of going back and dragging Ash with him; even if Ash did not want to see Eiji again, after all they'd been through Sing still felt Ash owed Eiji that much.

But the gunshot had come from the direction of a place where Ash still had been, and Sing didn't like it at all. He turned and set off, running as fast as he could back toward the library. He searched the area, hand going to his own concealed weapon, looking down each alley until he found what he'd dreaded... but certainly not having happened this way.

One man was slumped down to the ground, lifeless, and as he drew closer Sing's gut was filled with a wrenching pain. He stopped and as his mind caught up with his racing body he registered the blank stare of his brother Lau, blood staining his clothing from a gunshot that, while not an instant killing blow, was still fatal nonetheless.

Sing turned his head to the other figure that was doubled over, hands on knees, gasping for air as blood dripped slowly from somewhere on his torso, the blond hair glinting in the patches of sun through the dappled shadows cast by the trees overhead. Ash turned his already pale face to Sing, words gasped out between labored breaths.

“He... didn't... want me... to kill you... in the fight...” Ash said, tone scraped raw as if he'd gargled with the gravel that was beneath his feet and becoming more stained with his blood by the moment.

“Did he shoot you? I only heard one shot,” Sing said, coming over to steady Ash as he tried unsuccessfully to stand on his own.

“N...no... stabbed... doesn't... matter... I'm done,” Ash said.

“No you're not!” Sing cried, tearing off his jacket and twisting it up into something resembling a rope. “This is gonna hurt,” he continued, looping the makeshift tourniquet around Ash's thin frame.

“Don't... you gotta hurry... before the cops come...” Ash gasped. “Just go... I'm done...”

“Shut the fuck up!” Sing cried, tying the jacket and pulling hard, at which Ash let out a half-scream. Realizing Sing wasn't going to relent Ash raised his hand, jamming a bunched-up mouthful of the sleeve of his trenchcoat between his teeth and biting down hard as Sing yanked on the jacket again. Ash's head hung forward, vision blurring with each surge of pain due to the tightening, but he was cognizant enough to see the flow of blood stopping enough that the red stain spreading over his shirt had ceased growing in size.

“Come on,” Sing said as the faintest notes of a siren began to materialize in the air. “I know you can't go fast but I know a couple of shortcuts.”

“Can't... go... to the hospital,” Ash gasped.

“I know. We'll patch you up,” Sing said, slinging Ash's arm over his shoulders.

“But... Lao...”

“I'll take care of it. Come _on_ ,” Sing growled, half-supporting and half-dragging Ash back behind the library building as the sirens drew closer, their escape time lessening by the second. Despite the temporary curtailing of the loss of blood Ash grew weaker quickly, causing Sing to sling him over his shoulder with Ash's yelp of pain the response.

“Sorry man, but it will be faster this way,” Sing said, hanging on as carefully as he could while taking off into a jog, crossing through several alleys and even through a couple of abandoned buildings. Through the haze of his vision Ash realized where Sing was going and used a half-slack arm to slap at the Chinese man's back.

“Don't... take... me home,” Ash said.

“What? Why?”

“Tell 'em... Lau got me.”

Through his confusion Sing was still on alert enough to alter the course he'd been taking, instead heading back toward Chinatown. When he felt it was safe he slipped inside another abandoned building about halfway there, setting Ash down so he could rest. Sing checked the tourniquet again to find it was still holding fast, though Ash was still quite pale. The pair appraised each other for several long moments until Sing's eyes were drawn to a familiar scrap of paper sticking out of Ash's coat pocket.

“You read the letter,” Sing confirmed; Ash's response was a nod.

“Gave me... a plane ticket too. Japan,” Ash murmured.

It only took a moment before Sing realized what was happening. “Everyone already thinks you're dead... or at least, the cops and the feds,” he said.

Ash's eyes met Sing's, that same fire in them even if it was only at a simmer instead of a blaze at the moment. Sing had barely opened his mouth to voice his next thought when Ash apparently read his mind.

“Sing... If I make it... you gotta help me disappear.”

Sing couldn't help but smile.

“Okay. First step... we gotta switch guns.”

  
  


  
  


“What? Oh god... no... how?”

Sing could barely hold it together as he listened to Eiji's agonized voice on the other end of the long-distance line. _Gotta make this sound good._

“I gave him your letter and I left him at the library. I was about 10 minutes away when I heard the shot... something told me to stick around. I went back and... oh god... I hate to say this...”

“It was Yau-Si, wasn't it?” Eiji asked through his hiccuping tears.

“No... Lao... he... didn't want Ash to kill me in the fight so he... yeah. He must have followed me there or followed Ash there. Brother or no... it was bullshit. He had already taken out Ash... there was nothing I could do. I... paid it back though. For Ash.”

There was silence on the other end for a full minute, possibly more. “You... killed your own brother?” Eiji finally whispered.

“I had to. What he did... I couldn't let it stand.”

“Will there be a funeral? For... Ash?” Eiji asked after another long pause.

“Nah... it's... taken care of. You know how it is. He's... he got a good sendoff.”

  
  


  
  


As Ash had told the story he'd stepped slowly toward Eiji, hands in full view to convince the now street-smart Japanese man that he was indeed who he said he was and that he meant him no harm. But now as Eiji looked up straight into those green eyes, there was no question who the weathered, now ruggedly-handsome younger man was.

“Where have you been?” Eiji asked him, still not quite comprehending that _Ash Motherfucking Lynx_ was standing in front of him seven years after Sing had told him – or claimed, rather – that Ash had been gunned down in cold blood.

“I made use of that ticket to Tokyo,” Ash said with that same roguish smirk that Eiji remembered from every time Ash had pulled off another impossible feat and had spared a moment to bask in his own successes. “But once I got there and couldn't find you, I knew I had to completely disappear. I found a place to stay – I still had Golzine's money of course – and bought a computer. I didn't know Japan was so far ahead with their technology, it was a pretty sweet setup for the time. I then proceeded to hack into every database I could that had a record of me. As far as the world is concerned, Ash Lynx might as well have been a fucking unicorn – plenty of stories about him, but no record he ever existed. Michael Paul Blanca, however, is a young American stock trader that lives off the dividends of many smart Japanese and US investments. Got a nice apartment overlooking Shibuya, even taught myself Japanese. I think you'll be proud of me to be honest, I'm pretty good at it now.”

Eiji was silent as he processed Ash's words, and then he suddenly found himself bursting into laughter.

“What?” Ash said, his typical “innocent” tone exactly as it had always been save for a bit deeper, slightly rough with age.

“If anyone could have pulled this off, it was going to be you!” Eiji said through his laughter. “I...” Eiji's emotions suddenly rebounded like a slingshot, bringing forth another burst of tears as he reached to wrap Ash in a crushing embrace, which the other man returned without hesitation – a reaction that Eiji, even in his mixture of grief turned happiness, did not miss.

“I can't believe you're alive,” Eiji sobbed into Ash's shoulder, arms tight around him. “I... was only just recently able to start letting you go... I couldn't even look at the photos I took until then...”

“And now my mug's all over the walls,” Ash said, the tone playful yet wistful at the same time. Eiji raised his head then, stepping back and removing his glasses to swab the lenses off with the edge of his t-shirt before setting them back onto his nose.

“I put that one up first,” Eiji said, motioning to “Dawn” in its place of reverence in the center of the back wall. “And then... when it brought me some peace... I decided to show the rest.”

Ash reached out to cradle the hand Eiji had gestured with in his own. “You're shaking.”

Eiji turned to him, a lock of his silky black hair falling over one eye as his head snapped toward him with a motion that came from the urge to laugh; a smile crossed his face instead. “How is one supposed to act when they're speaking to a ghost?”

“Touché,” Ash replied, patting the back of Eiji's hand before releasing it. “Although you're otherwise remarkably calm. I guess I shouldn't have expected anything less... you were always a lot stronger than me.”

Eiji blinked, face pulling into a confused frown. “What?”

“I might have had the brains to pull off embezzlement and all that other crap... but you had the head that always stayed level. Always allowed yourself to _feel_ no matter what was going on. And somehow, even with all those feelings going on, everything you went through because of me... you never wanted to run.”

“And do you, still?” Eiji asked.

“Do I what?”

“Do you still want to run?”

“Yeah,” Ash said, another one of those mischievous smirks playing over his features. “I got bored in Japan. Time to pick up and move shop. So Mikey came back home to New York City when he found out his heart was still there.”

The wink that punctuated Ash's ending words filled Eiji's own heart with warmth, drawing his face into a grin of its own. “And I came back to New York City because the other half of my soul was here... or so I thought.”

Ash reached for Eiji's hand once more, his tone soft. “It is now... and so is mine.”

“Hey! How did you get in here?”

Both men were startled at the sharp, somewhat panicked words of the security guard, who had come back to see why Eiji had lingered longer than was normal. Ash released Eiji's hand as the Japanese man smiled winningly, brushing the errant strands of hair out of his face.

“Oh this is Michael, a friend of mine,” Eiji said. “I'd thought he had left, but he got caught up in another exhibit and didn't realize it was past closing time. It's fine, we'll be leaving shortly.”

“All right... as long as you're okay,” the guard said, relaxing noticeably. “But it's near midnight, you should probably go before the main security system from corporate kicks in. I might have trouble explaining having to disarm it.” Eiji nodded in response and the guard took his leave. When he looked back at Ash, he knew exactly what that glint in his eyes meant.

“The system will kick in at 12:05. We have enough time,” Ash smirked.

“Of course,” Eiji said as if it were the most natural thing in the world for someone to be capable of reconfiguring a ridiculously intricate security system without being detected. And well... for Ash Lynx, it was. “But we should be going. Come home with me, I'll make us something to eat.”

“Sounds good to me,” Ash replied as they headed toward the exit; he then turned his head to Eiji, nose wrinkled.

“Just so you know... I still hate natto.”

“Well then, I guess you'll have to starve.”

Ash stopped mid-step; Eiji followed suit. As if some telepathic link had passed between them, they turned and embraced once more, and this time both pairs of eyes – deep brown and glistening green – sparkled with tears. They spent a few more moments taking in each other's presence before stepping back out of the embrace, at which Ash looked at the clock on the wall.

“Twelve-oh-two,” Ash said.

“It's all right,” Eiji said as they crossed through the foyer, exiting out of the front doors just as the clock struck 12:04. “We have all the time in the world now.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eiji learns more about how his unexpected good fortune has come to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I _thought_ this was only going to be a one-shot... but I've decided to continue on as the need to flesh out the rest of this alternate ending wouldn't leave my brain.

“Do you always walk home this late, alone?”

The streets of the Village were mostly quiet, with just an occasional car passing by as Eiji led Ash to his apartment. The gallery wasn't all that far, and despite Ash's protests that they get a cab, Eiji had still opted to walk.

“Usually I don't stay this late, and a lot of times Sing is still around too. He was busy tonight though. Tonight I just felt like... I shouldn't leave at the normal time. So I just took inventory of the photos that are up and am deciding if I want to add any more, and time got away from me. But still I didn't want to leave. I guess I know why now. I've always been able to feel you... I realized it on the plane home that day.”

“Realized what?” Ash asked as Eiji swiped his card to unlock the doors of the apartment building.

“How connected to you I really was.” Eiji turned toward Ash as he pressed the “up” button for the elevator. “The plane was just taking off and I... felt something, like for a few moments I couldn't breathe. I found out later it was the moment you... well, it must have been the moment Lau injured you, but until tonight I thought it was the moment you'd died.”

Ash couldn't help but smirk at that as the elevator doors opened and they stepped inside. “Well... I thought it was going to be. I actually wanted it to be. But Sing was too damn stubborn.”

It was hard to tell if it was the jolt of the elevator as it began its ascension that jarred Eiji, or the cause was Ash's words. “Why did you want to die?” Eiji asked, that familiar wide-eyed expression that Ash remembered well crossing his face even through the glasses he now wore.

“I was tired. And... the one thing I wanted most, I couldn't have. Everyone I'd ever wanted to see get what was coming to them, did. I didn't feel like I had much else left. So much had happened that it just felt like it was time.”

Eiji decided to mull over Ash's words as the elevator opened rather than have him expound further. He had so many questions for Ash, so much he wanted to know as it was, that he instead put the new batch that Ash's revelation brought forth in with the rest, to pose slowly. To bombard the Ash that Eiji remembered with too many questions was the best way to get him to shut down and not talk at all, and Eiji had to unearth all he knew about how to handle his once volatile – _still_ volatile? – dearest friend before he proceeded to attempt to fill in the last seven years.

Eiji led Ash down to the end of the hallway to the door of one of the two large condos on either side of each of the building's floors. A skittering sound and a 'whuff' followed by whimpers greeted their approach.

“I have a dog, his name is Buddy. He's really friendly, I'll try to keep him from pouncing on you,” Eiji said as he fumbled with his keys, then suddenly went still at another sound from behind the door.

“Easy boy, it's just Eiji coming home.”

Ash's eyes went wide. “Is that --”

“It's Sing,” Eiji murmured, visibly nervous now. “He hangs out at my place a lot even though he has his own. Mostly because he wants to make sure I don't work too hard and that I eat. He wasn't supposed to be here tonight though... he said he had plans.”

“I can go, I've got a room at the hotel not far from here. You don't have to do this tonight,” Ash said. “It's going to be nuts if I walk in and he realizes who I am and I don't want you caught in the crossfire.”

Eiji shook his head. “He doesn't carry anymore. He's... well, a lot has happened...”

“Eiji? Who are you talking to?” Both men nearly jumped out of their skins when the door swung open and Sing appeared in the swath of light that opened out into the dimly-lit hallway, holding onto Buddy's collar as the dog tried to run to his owner.

“Uh... oh! Sing! I didn't think you'd be here,” Eiji said. “This is Michael, one of my friends from the photography collective. He was at the exhibit tonight and wanted to make sure I got home safely. I'll just be a minute.” Ash had stepped back just out of the full light of the door, his face obscured by shadows and the reflection off his glasses.

“All right. I'll heat up the dinner plate I made you, you've gotta be hungry,” Sing said. “Come on Buddy.” He tugged the dog back and closed the door as the animal whined in protest, the single click revealing he'd left it unlocked.

“I'll go to the hotel for tonight,” Ash said. “We'll figure out everything tomorrow.”

“The gallery doesn't open until 3 pm. I will come see you at the hotel so we can talk,” Eiji said.

“You got a phone?” Ash asked.

“Yes.” Eiji recited the number as Ash entered it into his. “I'll text you the hotel address and room number. It will come from my other name.”

Eiji nodded in response as Ash turned to leave. “A--” He stopped himself before he said the name aloud, then raised the volume of his voice just slightly. “I will talk to you tomorrow, Michael. Thanks for walking me home.”

Ash smirked, then lowered his glasses just far enough down his nose to reveal the wink he shot back. “No problem, kiddo. Anytime.”

Eiji watched as Ash walked back down the hall toward the turnoff at the halfway point that led to the elevators. “Text me when you get home, so I know you're safe,” he called after him.

The figure at the end of the hall turned back for a moment, just under one of the dome lights set into the ceiling, its warm glow catching the gold of his hair as he nodded in acknowledgment, then turned and disappeared into the alcove. Eiji waited until he heard the elevator doors close before he turned and walked into the apartment, closing the door behind him. Buddy came bounding out into the living room from the kitchen, whimpering and yipping in welcome as Eiji hung up his jacket. He walked into the kitchen, where the microwave whirred while warming up the aforementioned dinner plate. Sing was just finishing putting away the dishes Eiji had used to make breakfast for both of them that morning.

“So why didn't your friend want to come in?” Sing asked.

“He's... well...” Eiji suddenly realized he hadn't thought that far ahead.

Sing paused then. “Ah... yeah, I wasn't supposed to be here. My plans ended up getting canceled and I thought you were going to be home. I was gonna leave when it got later but then I got worried so I stayed. I should have just called you.”

“It's fine,” Eiji said as the microwave beeped; he rose to go get the plate. “Thanks for the food, I was definitely hungry.”

“So... is this Michael... _that_ kind of friend?” Sing said with a light smile as Eiji sat back down. For a moment Eiji wasn't sure what Sing was asking, and then the realization hit him.

“I... don't know what it is just yet,” Eiji said as he picked up a mouthful of the chow fun Sing had made with his chopsticks, one of Eiji's favorites. “We're just getting to know each other really. He's just come back to New York City after a long time away so everything's kind of new and up in the air.”

“Ah... I wasn't sure if I maybe ruined your night or something like that,” Sing said, immediately laughing softly as Eiji's face flushed bright red.

“No! It's not like that... We worked together a bit when I was first here and then he left. So we're just getting to know each other again... we were a lot younger then so it's all kind of brand new.”

There was a quiet pause then as Sing answered a text he received, the exchange lasting several minutes as Eiji ate his very late dinner. He'd just finished and set down his chopsticks when his own phone pinged with a message from Michael Blanca:  _At the hotel. Courtyard Manhattan Soho, 1518. Sleep tight._

“I dunno, that smile sure says he's 'that' kind of friend.”

Eiji blinked as Sing's words broke him from his thoughts. “I...”

“I'm just teasing,” Sing said. “Whatever it is... it's just nice to see you happy. I hope it works out, no matter what it turns out to be.”

“Thanks,” Eiji said softly, rising to take his plate to the sink. “You might as well stay, there's no more trains for the night.”

Sing flashed his usual winning grin. “I thought you'd never ask.”

“You're ridiculous,” Eiji smiled. “Anyway, I'm going to bed.”

“All right. I have an early appointment tomorrow so I'll probably be gone when you get up. I'll make sure the coast is clear before I visit again,” Sing said with a wink.

“Will you stop!” Eiji laughed. “Goodnight, Sing.”

Eiji went to his room, with Buddy following close behind. He closed the door and sat down on the bed, once again opening the message from Michael Blanca and typing out a quick reply.

_Sleep well, A. See you tomorrow._

  
  


  
  


Eiji knocked on the door of Ash's room after texting he was there, still mindful of the precautions they'd always taken even after so much time had passed. The door opened just enough for Eiji to enter, and as he turned to make sure it closed and Ash walked back into the room, Eiji had to stop himself for a moment.

Ash's now waist-length hair was loose, flowing over his bare back as he padded back over to the table in the room wearing only pajama pants and slippers. As he looked over his shoulder with those same piercing green eyes, a smile played over his features.

“What's wrong?” Ash asked. “Don't just stand there. Breakfast is gonna get cold.”

Eiji blinked, then drew in a breath as he walked over to the table, sitting down in the other padded chair. Ash was uncovering a typical American breakfast of eggs, sausage, bacon, toast, fruit, milk and coffee – all things that Eiji remembered Ash favoring but almost never having on a consistent basis when they were on the run, other than when they were hiding in plain sight in the apartment he'd bought with the money he'd embezzled from Golzine.

“I was kind of missing this, not gonna lie,” Ash said. “I got used to eating Japanese breakfasts because they're more healthy. But I think I'm going to give myself a day off from that,” he said as he poured his coffee. “Hope you're okay with it.”

“Of course,” Eiji said. “I've been here long enough that I switch it up now. Some days I'll meet up with Max for breakfast too.”

“You're gonna have to update me on everyone,” Ash said.

“I will,” Eiji replied. “But first I just want to know how you managed to get to Japan and live on your own.”

“It was tricky at first. I had to hide while I healed up and I had to work out getting ID to get past airport security and then customs. It helped that the ticket was open-ended so that bought me some time. I dyed my hair black, bought some clothes that made me look different. Sing is the one that made up the story to cover for the fact that there wasn't a body.”

“He... never really told me what was supposed to have happened other than Lau was the one to “kill” you, and that he was too late to do anything more other than kill Lau in retaliation.”

“What actually happened was he heard the gun when I shot Lau after he stabbed me. He found me when Lau was already dead. He tied off the wound and got me to a safehouse. We switched weapons and wiped them down for prints. He then told the cops that he found Lau dumping my body in the Hudson but was too late to stop him. He said they were walking back to Chinatown when Lau tried to kill him so he wouldn't snitch but that he shot Lau instead when they were near the library, then ran when he heard the cops coming. He told the cops Lau had me tied to a couple of cinder blocks. They dragged the Hudson for a couple days but never found me. Most of those cops were happy to be rid of me anyway with all the trouble I caused, so they decided not to waste any more taxpayer money on the search.”

Eiji shook his head as he swallowed a mouthful of egg. “He's held this from me all this time? He's known you were alive?”

“Yeah. We haven't talked since a bit after got to Japan, so for all he knows I'm dead for real. He doesn't even know my new identity so even if he tried to find me, he wouldn't have been able to.”

Eiji had to smile at that, too concerned for the moment with Ash's story to ponder the deeper secret Sing had been holding back on all these years. “So once you got to Japan? What then?”

“I took out a bunch of cash from my stash of Golzine's money, so I got one of those pay-as-you-go phones and called Sing to tell him I'd made it there. I fumbled my way through getting a place and figuring out my way around. The 24-hour konbini around the corner was perfect because I could go there in the middle of the night for food and to get money from the ATM. It took me a long time to not sneak around on habit anymore, so at the time it worked out well. I tried to look you up online just to see where you were for when I was ready to come find you, but by the time I did turn up something you weren't there anymore. The last time I contacted Sing to tell him that, he told me you were in New York and thought I was dead. It worked out for the best really, because I wasn't ready to re-emerge yet. It made everything easier at that point.

“I bought a laptop and used the free wifi I could pick up from the different businesses near the apartment. I started hacking into every place I knew of that would have records of Ash Lynx's existence, and wiping them out. News sites, police records, anything computerized. I'm sure there's some paper files still out there, but who's gonna bother with them now? It took about a month, but I erased Ash and built an entire history for Michael Paul Blanca, from the ground up. I also started researching the Japanese stock market. Started trading online with Golzine's money... and it paid off quite well. I set up my own accounts under my new self, but I've still got a decent stash in that offshore account too. For backup.”

Eiji smiled then. “So why haven't you been telling me all this in Japanese, if you're so good at it?” he challenged. “How did you learn it?”

A grin spread over Ash's face from over the edge of his coffee cup. Setting it down, he continued, switching into flawless Japanese.

< “I taught myself Japanese through computer programs and getting out and meeting people. Izakayas are a trip, I've got a few favorites now. At first I couldn't understand much, but I just kept at it. The more drunk people get, the more they want to talk to you, and the less they'll remember what you tell them. It couldn't be more perfect.” >

Eiji burst into laughter, shaking his head and replying in Japanese as well. < “You're ridiculous. You sound like you've been speaking it since childhood. I'm impressed.” >

< “Your English is decent,” > Ash shot back with a grin. < “I can understand you now.” > It was his turn to laugh out loud as Eiji flipped him off with a grin in response.

“So where are you living now?” Eiji said, shifting back to English.

“I have a pretty sweet condo in Shibuya, looks out over the city. The view kind of reminds me of the one from the apartment we had here for a while when shit was happening. I work from home from 8:00 to 16:00, then sit back and watch the dividends roll in. But... it's been getting pretty lonely. I started thinking about coming back around six months ago, and that's when I started seeing articles about you. When I saw the exhibit was happening, I figured it would be the easiest way to make contact. If I tried any other way, you'd have probably thought it was a sick hoax. I thought about contacting Sing first, but I couldn't trust him to not tell you right away. I saw him in a lot of your photos, so I knew you were still friends with him. My hunch was obviously right.”

“You always were good at reading situations,” Eiji said. “I'm not surprised you figured out that much.” He finished his food, refilling his coffee from the carafe on the table. “So... are you moving back to New York?”

< “I... haven't decided yet. Though I'm really attached to Tokyo now,” > Ash said, slipping effortlessly back into Japanese. < “It depends... how at home you are here now.” >

Eiji's eyes widened a bit at that, eyebrows raising momentarily before he began his reply. < “Well... I... I ended up staying here because it helped me feel closer to you. I... had not really accepted that you were gone, for some reason. I couldn't, I guess. I hadn't even been able to look at my photos of you until just before the exhibit opened, and it was only because Sing had started to work on getting through to me. The room with your photos was my way of starting to move forward, to having some kind of closure, I guess. But there was a part of me that was still not wanting to let go... and now I think I realize why. Maybe I just always knew you weren't really gone.” >

< “So you'd go back to Japan, or consider it?” >

< “If you were there... I think I would go back. I do love it here, and some places remind me of where I was from in Tokyo. Some of the places you used to know are cleaned up now, the areas are getting better. There's still dark places though. But... there are still no guns in Japan.” >

< “Not that I need them anymore. I was all too happy to leave that behind. I can't say I've healed from everything... I don't know if I ever really will. But I'd like to think I'm better than I was.” >

< “You were always a good person, deep inside, Ash. You did the things you did because you had to. You always said you never would let anyone hurt me... but I always wanted to protect you. I always believed that if I could take you away from the life you were in, you could change and be at peace. I'm glad you found that out for yourself, because you've always been too stubborn to listen to me.” > Eiji's last words were colored with the tone of the smile that spread over his face.

Ash smiled in return and then his face turned thoughtful. He rose, suddenly gathering up the empty breakfast plates, an action Eiji remembered immediately – whenever Ash didn't want someone to know something had affected him, he would do something to cover his emotions. It seemed some habits had still continued on even with the definite sense of peace that Ash exuded now. He seemed relaxed, a state Eiji had only ever seen him in in rare moments – and in those rare moments, it had caused bad things to happen when Ash's guard had been down.

As Ash walked away to put the breakfast tray out in the hall for housekeeping to pick up Eiji found himself looking over the other man, still shirtless as he paused to read the room service schedule on the inside of the door. His eyes wandered down to the dimpled area of skin on the right side of Ash's abdomen, a silvery scar that hadn't been there the last time Eiji remembered seeing him that way. Eiji felt the sadness settle over him as Ash returned to the table, stopping a few paces away when he caught the expression on Eiji's face. He remembered it well: it was the one where Eiji had come to a realization over something that Ash may or may not would want to hear.

“What's wrong?” Ash asked.

“My letter. It caused you to drop your guard, didn't it? Sing said you were outside the library...”

“What happened wasn't your fault, Eiji. It was my own for not thinking. But I knew I didn't have a lot of time... and I was gonna see if I could still get back to you. Have you... you couldn't let me go because you thought you caused it, didn't you?”

“Don't lie to me!” Eiji snapped, the tears welling up and spilling over his face. “I know it was my fault. I knew you had the letter, and every time something bad happened where you were off guard it was because I did something to cause it.”

Ash walked over and crouched in front of Eiji's chair, reaching out to lay his hands on the other's shoulders. “It wasn't your fault. It was never your fault. It was my fault you got shot, because I was the one not paying attention. But no matter what... those moments were the ones where I felt like maybe I had some kind of soul left. But at the end of the day... at that time... I had no way out. That was why I was at peace with dying, because I thought you could move on if I was gone, and I knew you'd be safe from my world when you went back to Japan. And of course I had the impeccable timing to turn up just as you figured that out for yourself.”

Eiji leaned forward then, wrapping his arms around Ash's shoulders, spurring Ash to return the embrace. Eiji buried his face into Ash's shoulder, sobbing quietly. “I'm glad I didn't have to. I would have dreams about you... that you were alive. And then I'd wake up and it would just feel the same all over again, like the day I lost you. I'd have to get up and go through another day remembering that you were gone for good, that I would never see you again.” He drew back then to look into Ash's eyes.

“I will go wherever you decide to be,” Eiji said, the tone definitive; there was no changing his mind.

Ash smiled softly at that. “I've got to figure it out. But it already feels like there's too many ghosts here. And I have to decide if it's wise to let anyone else I knew know that I'm alive.”

“I think... you should let Sing know.”

“Yeah... it might be good to start there. Then feel out the rest. It might be best to just let others be.”

There was a silence between them then during which they both moved back into the embrace, taking in each other's presence for quite some time. Eventually Eiji found his focus return, his eyes traveling down the shimmery curtain of Ash's hair splayed over his back.

“I like your hair,” Eiji said softly.

“I like yours too,” Ash replied, raising his head and drawing back to take in Eiji's face. “You don't look twelve anymore, finally. You're almost as pretty as me.”

Eiji broke into laughter again. “And you look like an old man now!” he shot back. “But you're still beautiful.”

“I guess my past caught up with my looks a bit,” Ash shrugged. “So much for that old saying about living fast, dying young and leaving a good looking corpse. I failed that mission.”

Eiji reached out again and pulled Ash close, one hand moving over the silky blond flowing over his back, the morning sun streaming through the window catching the strands of silver mixed in. “I'm so happy you did,” he replied.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More to come, whenever it decides to play nice and jump from brain to keyboard. Stay tuned. :)


	3. Chapter 3

Eiji made his usual rounds of the exhibit area before the gallery closed for the night, and for the first time since he'd begun to add the photos of Ash, he didn't linger to ruminate over them. Instead he stopped at the office to gather his things and headed to the entrance, even surprising the security guard who'd grown accustomed to the young photographer lingering after closing. Instead Eiji checked his phone, a comfirmational smile playing over his face at the message he expected to see as he said goodnight, stepping out onto the sidewalk while the guard locked up behind him. The figure stepping up to him from just off to the left of the doors caused no alarm, even if he could be classified as a ghost.

“I was going to come in, but I saw a few familiar faces,” Ash said, stepping to the curb to hail a cab before Eiji could convince him to walk again.

“Yes, Mr. Jenkins, with Max,” Eiji confirmed as they got into the cab. “They'd come to see the last photos of you I'd put up this week.”

Ash was silent as he followed Eiji into the cab before finally responding. <“How did they take it?”> he asked, switching to Japanese to keep their words private from the driver.

<“They asked about when the photos were taken, and then we talked about what we all remembered about those times. I think they've both gotten better over time... they have families to focus on. Max and Jessica remarried not long after I returned when you... well, when you “died”, as far as they're concerned. They all wish you were still here. They talk about wishing you'd had a chance to have a better life after Golzine was gone. Their sadness comes from that, mainly... that you didn't have a chance to get out of that world and enjoy being free.”>

<“That's pretty ironic,”> Ash smirked. <“Just before I got your letter from Sing, I had talked with Blanca. He had wanted me to come with him, 'retire' to the islands and live there in peace.”>

Eiji raised his eyebrows then, eyes going wide as well. <“Why didn't you go?”>

<“Honestly, I don't remember now. But then again, seeing Blanca every day would have just made any kind of healing that much more difficult.”>

The cab stopped at Eiji's building and the pair headed upstairs, their conversation paused as Eiji unlocked his apartment door, once again greeted by Buddy as Ash followed him inside.

“I'm not surprised you have a dog,” Ash said as he bent down to pet the animal as it snuffled around his legs in between begging for attention.

“I found him in a trash can. I was walking with Sing and I heard a whimper. Someone had just thrown this puppy away. I couldn't just leave him,” Eiji replied. “It was someone to come home to, to take care of.”

“You'll probably have to look into specifics if you want to bring him with you,” Ash said, causing Eiji to pause, blinking for a second until he realized what Ash referred to.

“Oh... he's up to date on everything. I do go back to Japan to see Ibe-san, and sometimes I stay for several months. I take him with me. So it shouldn't be too hard.”

Ash laughed at that. “You mean to tell me you've probably been under my nose at various times over these last years and I never knew?”

Eiji snorted, crossing his arms, an almost annoyed look on his face. “Look who's talking.”

Ash blinked, then laughed again with a shrug. “Touché.”

“You're ridiculous,” Eiji laughed. “Anyway, relax, grab a drink from the fridge if you like. I'll make something to eat when I get back from walking Buddy.”

Upon Eiji's return the pair fell into another old routine they'd often done back then as Eiji began putting together an easy baked chicken recipe, accepting Ash's offer to help throw a salad together. As they sat down to eat the pair compared notes regarding their experiences living in each other's countries for seven years. As the meal concluded and Eiji cleaned up, he noticed Ash had become rather pensive – not unusual for him, but after their nearly continual conversation for the past couple of hours, the silence stood out.

“What is it?” Eiji asked, sitting in his chair again; at his feet, Buddy lifted his head from where he lay, nosing at Eiji's hand until he patted the dog's head absently.

“I'm just... seriously weighing how I should make my presence known... especially if you think there's any possibility of coming back to Japan with me,” Ash said, his voice edged with a bit of sadness. “If you tell people you're moving back to Japan with your friend, they're going to want to know who that friend is. When you come home, Ibe will want to know who it is you brought back with you. I mean... your reaction was nowhere near what I expected. It was almost like... you expected it.”

“Maybe it was because I never let go,” Eiji said. “I'd only just really begun to. There's still places I've never been able to go... I couldn't even look at the library even as much as a few days ago when I passed by it on a bus ride. I hadn't let the grieving start, because it meant accepting you were never coming back, even though I knew you weren't. Or at least, that's what I thought.”

“That's what I mean though... everyone else has gone past that. They believe I'm dead, never questioned Sing's story. I mean... how will Max take it? Jenkins? Will they be happy to see that I did achieve what they'd wished I could have, or will it be like 'oh fuck, he's alive, here we go again?',” Ash said, rubbing his forehead with a hand.

“I think it will be the former, especially since you made the effort to leave that life. You live a life of peace, far away from anything like what you were trapped in before.”

“But honestly, will it be better for them to just move on? It seems like I've been forgotten anyway...”

“No... never forgotten, Ash. You left a mark on everyone that was ever near you.”

Ash remained silent for a bit then, hand covering his mouth as he contemplated Eiji's words. He'd just raised his head and was about to speak again when suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Eiji's eyes widened and he muttered “shit” as he heard a voice he hadn't expected to hear.

“Eiji, it's Sing.”

“I'll take care of it,” Eiji said as he rose.

“No... you know what... let him in,” Ash said. “He might be able to help us figure out this dilemma.”

Eiji hesitated for a bit longer, then nodded as he turned to go to the door.

“Hey, I know I wasn't supposed to stop by tonight but I ended up being in the area,” Sing said as he walked into the kitchen. “I – oh. You should have told me you had company, I can --”

“It's fine, Sing.”

Sing froze at the voice that came from the person he had, a moment before, thought was a stranger. He walked a step closer, eyes narrowing suspiciously as he looked at the person he'd only gotten a glimpse of previously, that Eiji had said was named “Michael”. The blond man reached up, removing the glasses whose lenses were just tinted enough that in the diffused light of the ceiling fan bulbs had hidden his eyes.

It didn't matter how many lines creased that face with age. There was no mistaking those eyes.

Eiji took a step forward as Sing's stance seemed to change a bit, falling back into the old offensive stance he'd always affect when speaking to someone that was deemed a potential threat.

“Ash??”

Ash nodded, that same smirk that Eiji knew well playing over his features. A moment later, the smirk widened. “Calm down. I'm not packing. I haven't in seven years.”

Sing let out a sharp exhale, shoulders dropping into their usual relaxed state. He then turned to Eiji.

“Why didn't you say something?” Sing asked.

“I could say the same to you, but I already know Ash didn't want you to,” Eiji replied as he motioned for Sing to sit at the table.

“I didn't think you'd ever come back,” Sing said.

“I got bored,” Ash said with a dismissive shrug.

“I'm going to assume no one else knows you're here,” Sing said.

“So far,” Ash replied. “Eiji and I were just discussing that actually. I'm going to assume that eventually people are going to want to meet this person that's in Eiji's life.”

“Well yeah,” Sing said. “I mean... it depends on how much you're going to be in his life.”

“I'm thinking of going back to Japan with him,” Eiji said.

“Permanently?” Sing's tone was incredulous. “I thought you were at home here. Even got your green card.”

“Well yes, but Japan doesn't offer dual citizenship,” Eiji reminded him. “I go back and forth for work now anyway.”

Sing nodded pensively. “Pretty ironic, after you finally start moving on, that this happens,” Sing said, turning his focus back to Ash. “Why now?”

“I started seeing things about his photography work, both stuff in Japan and here in New York. I debated for a long time whether I wanted to do this or not. But as good as I've got it there now, there had always been something missing. Once I realized what that was, I made my choice. Now it's just a matter of if I let anyone else know, and if so, who.”

“Who were you thinking of telling?” Sing asked.

“There's only a few. Jenkins, Max. I don't even know who from the old gang is around anymore and who they're connected to. It's best to let that dead dog rot in the grave.”

“New York is a lot more secure now,” Sing said. “I've got my eyes and ears out. The last of Golzine's group was swept up not long after you left.”

Eiji had gone silent, seeming to be thinking deeply as the two men talked. Ash turned to him with a smirk. “Hey, you with us?” he asked, causing Eiji to blink back into the present.

“I think... you should only tell Max,” Eiji finally said. “Of everyone that's left from that time... he would be the one who would want to know. It's always been a sticking point that there was never a body, no closure. And of anyone, I think he can be trusted to keep things secret.”

“Even from Michael and Jessica?” Sing asked. “Jessica would probably keep mum but I don't know about Michael. He still idolizes Ash and would probably want to keep in touch with him and there's always a chance something could slip. Not that I think anyone would still be looking for Ash now... but still.”

“I think I'll keep it to Max,” Ash agreed. “After losing Griffin and then me... I think I owe him that much.”

“Max is only here for a few more days. He'll be leaving for California soon,” Eiji said. “We can meet him here, I'll invite him for a farewell dinner.”

“Sounds good,” Ash said. “And... I think, when we get back to Japan... I want to see Ibe-san.”

Eiji smiled as Ash used the correct Japanese honorific in reference to his mentor. “Yes... I know we can trust him as well.”

“What are you gonna do with this place?” Sing asked, indicating the apartment with a vague gesture of his hand.

“Well I do go back and forth anyway because of my visa and the way it works. I have to leave the country every three months, even if it's just to Canada for a vacation. So I'll keep it, we'll probably be visiting anyway.”

“All right,” Sing said. “I'll keep an eye on it as always.”

“You mean you'll house-sit,” Eiji laughed. “Because you don't have your own house to live in.”

“It's a lot more quiet here,” Sing said. “I'm just saying you don't have to worry about anything in New York. I got it.”

“Everyone always wants to take care of me. I'm a big boy now,” Eiji chided him warmly. “I think I've grown up quite a bit since I first got off the plane.”

“I think we all have,” Ash said quietly.

Eiji snorted at that, giving Ash a side-eye. “Yeah, you're doing pretty well for a dead man.”

Ash's eyebrows raised at that. “Someone's grown some extra sass.”

Eiji flashed him a smug grin in response. “I learned from the best.”

  
  


  
  


It was just before midnight and the last trains of the night when Sing took his leave just as weather alerts popped up on all three men's phones warning of severe thunderstorms for the next several hours. The sky was already being lit up with flashes of lighting, the quiet purr of distant thunder slowly drawing closer with each consecutive rumble.

“I guess I'd better get back before I get soaked through,” Ash said.

“Or you could just stay here,” Eiji replied, prompting Ash to turn away from the window he'd been watching the coming storm from to face him.

“I guess I can sleep on the couch,” Ash nodded, “since you only have one bed.”

“That wasn't a problem before,” Eiji said. “Especially on the tougher nights.”

Ash paused then, eyes flickering downward as he searched his memories, wading through more things he'd rather forget to find those things he remembered about his time with Eiji from what felt like a century ago rather than seven years.

“You're right,” he finally replied, his tone considerably softer. “I guess I forgot after so long... or it just got buried under a lot of other stuff.”

“It's all right,” Eiji said, walking over to Ash and placing a hand on his shoulder. “I guess everyone else is just better at moving on than me.”

“I can't say I moved on, per se,” Ash said. “It's just... still really hard to think about those times. I still remember the last time I saw you...”

“At the hospital,” Eiji said. “In the hallway. For a long time I couldn't remember it because after you left, I collapsed because I was still weak. I thought the last time was right after I'd been shot... but it came back to me in the last few days.”

“I've had to live with that since then,” Ash said. “That you almost died because of me. That was the reason I knew I couldn't ever see you again. It would never be safe, you'd never not be in danger. And as much as that hurt, not being able to have you with me, to be with you... I knew you were better off. But now... The world thinks Ash Lynx is dead. I've erased his existence, even have my name changed legally... well... maybe not _totally_ legally,” he smirked, with Eiji responding in kind. “But what I'm saying is... I can keep you safe now.”

“You would have been safe in Japan with me,” Eiji said.

Ash shook his head. “There were still people with scores to settle. I'd have always been looking over my shoulder. Yau-Si might have had connections with the Yakusa for all I knew. The only way for me to ever be completely free – from the mafia, from everything that haunted me – was to die. And I was ready to accept that.”

Eiji stared up into Ash's eyes then, the other man returning his gaze. The dimly lit apartment was illuminated with another bright flash of lightning, the thunder louder as the storm drew closer.

“I wasn't,” Eiji finally replied. “And I'm glad I don't have to now. I said I'd stay with you forever, and that my soul was always with you. Maybe it was my soul that kept me holding on... and maybe it pulled you back to me.”

“That's as good a theory as any,” Ash said with another smirk and shrug.

Eiji reached out then, slipping his arms around Ash's back and smiling as the embrace was returned. Both of them startled as a loud clap of thunder rattled the windows.

“I still enjoy the storms,” Eiji said. “I know they used to give you bad dreams sometimes.”

“Not so much anymore,” Ash said. “I kind of like the rainy season in Tokyo now. But I like the thought of it not being quite so lonely anymore.”

Eiji smiled at that as the skies outside opened up, sheets of rain hitting the windows of the living room. “Come on, let's rest,” he said as he stepped back, letting one hand run down Ash's arm to clasp his hand.

“Bossy hm?” Ash teased as he followed him, squeezing Eiji's hand in an affectionate response.

“It's been a long day,” Eiji said as he led him to the bedroom.

“Oh yeah, that's right, you were always a cranky little shit when you were tired,” Ash replied, his tone still teasing.

“And you were always a snarling wildcat,” Eiji countered as he stripped off his shirt and jeans, then reached to the dresser for a comb as he pulled the elastic out of his glossy black hair, causing it to spill down to brush his shoulders. Behind him Ash had his back turned as he stripped down to his own briefs, the way they'd always slept so long ago. He turned toward Eiji as he laid his clothes on a chair, stopping at his view of the other man's back, his face sans glasses reflected in the mirror.

“What is it?” Eiji asked, addressing Ash's reflection as it drew closer; he smiled as Ash's arms wrapped around him from behind, his chin coming down to rest on Eiji's shoulder.

“You're even more beautiful than you were back then,” Ash said softly. “And... I've missed you.”

Eiji smiled at that, tipping his head to rest against Ash's. “I can say exactly the same of you.”

They stood that way for a bit, taking in each other's presence, minds and bodies growing reacquainted with each other on the more intimate level they'd once connected to each other with. Eiji turned in Ash's embrace after a bit, wrapping his arms around him again.

“You talk about taking care of me, but I always wanted to do the same for you,” Eiji said.

“Funny, isn't it?” Ash replied, quoting a few words from the letter Eiji had written him; he was then taken aback when rather than a soft laugh in reply, Eiji burst into tears, burying his face in Ash's shoulder. Ash rubbed his back softly, his own tears welling up and spilling down his cheeks.

“I'm here now, Eiji. And we'll have a chance now to have the life together I only thought was a pipe dream back then. I can't say I'm healed, I can't say I'm perfect. I've patched up a lot of the holes, but I've got as many scars in my mind and heart as I do on my body. But the one thing I can give you now is a life of peace. I can make up to you what you went through because of me.”

“ _For_ you,” Eiji corrected him through his tears. “I would do anything for you then, and I still would now.”

Ash tipped his head down then, nuzzling into Eiji's soft, silky hair. “Then, for now, how about you protect me from the storm... because to be honest, sometimes the thunder still is a bit too loud for my taste.”

Eiji raised his head then, meeting Ash's eyes with his own. “Tonight, and forever,” he replied.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many apologies for the long delay. I got a bit stuck on this, but I think I know where it's going now. There's still some more to come, hopefully sooner than this update. Thanks so much for reading, and for the many comments and kudos I've received. :)


	4. Chapter 4

Eiji awoke without his alarm for the first time in a bit as the gallery was closed on Wednesdays, grateful for that fact as he hadn't gotten much sleep. He and Ash had spent the majority of the night talking, with the pair catching each other up on their lives until they'd both become so sleepy they'd laid their heads down and fallen asleep almost simultaneously. It had felt different for a number of reasons – aside from the obvious, the biggest one being that there was nothing looming over their conversation. Eiji had always thought he'd seen Ash's guard let down completely, but now realized that even in their most unguarded moments with each other, Ash had never truly been at ease. Distracted, certainly – with disastrous results – but there had always been the tension about his person that was such a constant, Eiji hadn't ever noticed it until it was gone.

He opened his eyes slowly and looked over at the other side of the bed, where Ash lay sprawled as he always did when he slept. One arm hanging off the edge of the mattress, body at such an angle that Ash's legs were resting atop Eiji's as he infringed on Eiji's space, the one new element being the long braid that Eiji was already quite fond of. If it hadn't been for the warmth of Ash's skin on his, Eiji would have thought he was in the midst of one of the vivid dreams he'd always had, ones where he was 20 again, and Ash was still alive, but leaving him, telling him to go back to Japan, then turning his back, walking away. He'd wake up, realizing Ash was gone forever, and break down sobbing yet again.

Instead, Eiji was wrestling with some very different emotions as his eyes studied Ash's bare back. When they were younger, there wasn't really a name for the emotions they extended to each other. Mostly Eiji had felt protective of Ash, wanted to tear him away from the life he was living to have a life of peace and normalcy in Japan, as difficult, in retrospect, as that would have been. But now... Eiji was sure that if he could just lie here, with Ash alive, well and breathing, for the rest of his life, he could be content with that.

Eiji had just laid his head back down on the pillow to perhaps doze for a bit more when Ash drew in a breath, pulling himself back into his own space on the bed before turning to face Eiji, eyes still half-mast as he seemed to be considering more sleep as well. The corners of his mouth curled into a soft smile at seeing Eiji's face half-buried in the pillow, one warm brown eye looking back from under the longer strands of hair framing his face before Ash mashed his own face into the pillow.

“Morning. Why.”

Eiji had to laugh softly at Ash's muffled complaint, words that he'd thought he'd never hear again. “Actually it's closer to afternoon, but the good news is I've got nothing going on today,” Eiji said. “The weather is crap, so we might as well just stay right here.”

Ash peered out with one green eye and the hint of a placated smile. “Sounds like a plan,” he said. “I don't have to be back at the hotel, I booked it till Friday minimum.”

“You can always just stay here,” Eiji offered. “I very rarely have company unless it's Sing, or when Max and Jessica come in with Michael for a visit.”

“I can always hide in here if you do,” Ash said. “Unless it was someone who wouldn't recognize me.”

“Or I can just call you Michael and say I have a type,” Eiji teased, his reaction turning slightly surprised when he saw Ash's blink in response, until he realized what his words had inferred.

“I don't label myself,” Eiji said. “I just love.”

Ash raised his head, propping it up on his hand, elbow supporting it. “I was always afraid to call it that.”

“Love?”

“Yeah. Mostly because I wasn't even sure what love was, or if I was even capable of it. All I knew was you were the only person I could ever see myself letting in. The only person I let my guard down to. The only one I could tell anything, that I knew wouldn't judge me. But mostly because love always means... other things.”

“Love doesn't have to be physical. I don't think I ever felt that way about what was between us... at least not then. Well... except when there would be those moments when I'd realize how beautiful you were... and I'd try to sort out why it made me feel the way I did. I wasn't ready to comprehend that then.”

“Physical... was never synonymous with anything but pain for me. And... I don't know that I'll ever get past that. I never could even remotely think of you in that way... and I don't know --”

Eiji reached out, fingers gently covering Ash's lips to quiet him.

“I don't ask for or expect anything from you you're not willing to give freely. We've only been together again a couple of days. We don't have to sort out the rest of our lives. We don't have to name what we are. We just... are. And I'm just happy I have a chance for us to 'be' again.”

Eiji saw Ash's eyes glitter in the diffused morning light that filtered through the curtains, then felt the tears that slipped down his cheeks on the tips of his fingers before Ash's lips nuzzled them affectionately.

“That... was why,” Ash whispered tearfully.

“What was?”

“You only wanted friendship. You only wanted to be there for me. And never asked for anything in return. You gave of yourself freely to me, and there was never a price to pay. No one had ever done that for me, and I knew I couldn't accept that gift and let you in without risking your life. That was why I was drawn to you. I could trust you. I knew it from the moment we met, somehow. And I was never wrong. And I'd never met anyone that pure in my entire life, and I wasn't even sure I deserved it.”

“You did then, and you do now.” Eiji moved forward then, wrapping an arm over Ash's shoulders as Ash reached to pull him close.

“I still won't say forever,” Ash murmured into Eiji's hair. “I'm too afraid to, still.”

“I will,” Eiji replied. “Always. And I will keep saying it, no matter how many times I need to, until you believe me once and for all.”

They stayed that way for a bit, holding each other as yet another of the succession of storms the “summer NorEaster”, as the forecasters were calling it, rolled through the city, thunder rattling the windows. Finally hunger got to them both, and Ash offered to make a late breakfast which Eiji accepted. They were just sitting down to eat when Eiji's phone rang, the resulting expression on his face concerning Ash.

“What's wrong? Who is it?” Ash asked as Eiji stared at the screen, seeming hesitant to answer.

“It's Max. I'd better answer or he'll keep trying,” Eiji said, tapping the screen to take the call.

“Hey Eiji, it's me,” Max began. “Listen, I know the weather's shit today, but I'm having to cut my trip a bit short and head back home for work. I know today's your off day, you got some time to get together? I leave tomorrow morning.”

Eiji had put the call on speaker; Ash stayed quiet as he listened.

“I don't have any plans,” Eiji began. “I was just talking with Sing last night about having you over for dinner before you had to leave. It's supposed to stop raining this afternoon, I can run to the store and pick up some stuff. What would you like me to make?” he asked, trying to keep his voice from betraying the fact that he'd just become racked with nerves.

“What's that pancake thing again?” Max asked; Ash covered his mouth to conceal his laughter as he knew exactly what Japanese dish he was referring to.

“Okonomiyaki?” Eiji asked, “The 'as you like it'?”

“Yes! That was amazing the last time you made it. I'll go with that, if that's okay.”

“Sure! Sure, I can do that. How does six o'clock sound?”

Eiji looked at the clock; it was just a bit past 12:30 pm. “That's fine, it's a quick thing, I will make it when you get here. I'll have Sing come over too. Oh and...” Eiji stopped himself, looking up at Ash, who nodded his head silently in turn before eating another mouthful of his scrambled eggs.

“What's up?” Max asked.

“There will be... someone else here, that I would like you to meet. A... friend of mine from the photography collective. His name is Michael.”

“Eiji! You been holding out on me? You got a boyfriend?”

“I'm... not sure what we are exactly yet. But yes, he'll be here as well. I may be heading back to Japan for a while and I'm not sure when I'll see you again, so I figured it's a good time to introduce you.”

“Well I look forward to meeting him. I gotta catch up with a couple other people today, so I will see you at your place at six. Talk you later!”

“All right, see you then.” Eiji ended the call with a sharp exhale, head flopping down into folded arms. “I was hoping I would have at least a day to prepare for this!!” he said, voice muffled into his shirt sleeve.

“You out of anyone should be used to curve balls,” Ash said as he finished his food.

“Not so much of late,” Eiji said as he raised his head, picking up his chopsticks to resume eating.

“Well, I guess I better run back to the hotel to change. I can show up for dinner like everyone else,” Ash smirked.

“That works. While you're there... if you want to check out, you could do that too.”

“Taking that 'don't leave my side' thing literally huh?” Ash teased, hiding his latest smirk behind his coffee mug as he sipped.

“We have seven years to make up for,” Eiji said, his tone serious.

“True, true,” Ash said, trying to be nonchalant even while Eiji could see the glimmer in Ash's eyes that revealed Eiji's words had affected him. “I won't be gone long. Let's just hope no one sees me doing the walk of shame out of your place though.”

For a moment, Eiji didn't connect to the meaning of the phrase; when he did, he whipped the dishtowel he'd just picked up at Ash. “You are a million times worse than you ever were!” he laughed.

“I'm just sayin'!” Ash laughed as he peeled the towel off his face, tossing it back at Eiji who snatched it deftly out of the air. “Anyway, lemme get dressed and get out of here while the all the gods in Izumo aren't having a piss on the city. I'll be back here by six, and I'll come in after I see Max is here.”

  
  


Max and Sing arrived at Eiji's apartment a bit before 6 pm, which left Eiji making small talk while trying to cover for his nerves. He and Sing had discussed over the phone earlier that day what Max's reaction might be to the fact that Sing had also been lying to him for seven years about Ash. It was either going to go well or not well in spectacular fashion, and the both of them were preparing for the worst. Eiji was most worried about Max's temper – depending on how he ended up reacting, he might possibly come at Sing with his anger before even completely comprehending that Ash was alive, and he hoped that in turn wouldn't trigger Ash's old offensive ways, which he was certain that despite having no use for them, Ash hadn't lost in any measure.

The trio were just beginning to hear thunder again as Buddy lifted his head, sensing something a moment before they did with the knock on the door coming right after.

“Oh that's probably Michael, I'm glad he made it before the storm hit again,” Eiji said, getting up a little too quickly from the living room chair. “I'll be right back!” He then hurried out of the room, leaving Sing's senses coming online into alert mode as Max seemed at the very least to be concerned as to why Eiji seemed on edge.

Eiji went to the door and opened it slowly to find Ash in his long coat, grinning as he stepped in with his carry-on bag and a backpack.

“Just leave those in the spare room for now,” Eiji said, the tone absent as he became more distracted by his nerves.

“Calm down, it will be fine,” Ash said as he turned off to the side room, removing his backpack and coat to reveal a button-down dress shirt and skinny jeans with Doc Marten boots underneath. The sight was enough to bring Eiji's focus back a bit.

“You look nice,” Eiji said, smiling.

“You do too,” Ash replied with a wink. “Well... let's do this.”

Eiji took a deep breath. “Okay.”

The pair made their way to the living room, with Ash walking behind Eiji. Max and Sing appeared to be talking about something, their heads both turning in unison toward the doorway as they entered.

“Ah... Max... this is my friend... Michael,” Eiji said as the man behind him stepped into view.

Max rose, smiling genially and extending a hand. “Hi Michael, I'm Max. Nice to...”

As Max clasped hands with the “stranger” he looked at his face, eyes somewhat obscured by the slightly teal-tinted gold wire framed glasses, long braid slung forward over one shoulder, and froze.

“Nice to meet you, Max,” the “stranger” replied.

Max's face blanched white at the sound of his voice and he drew in a gasp, legs going slack as he fell back hard into the chair he'd been sitting in.

“What in the _fuck_... is this some kind of sick joke Eiji??” Max said. “This guy looks like...”

Ash reached up and removed the glasses, smirk playing over his face. “Awww, you remembered,” he said, tone teasing.

At that Max shot up to his feet again, adrenaline driving him now. “What the  _**fuck... Ash??** _ ” Ash's grin was his only reply. For a few moments Max stood frozen in place, gawking almost incoherently before he burst into sobs, lashing his arms around Ash into such a hard bear-hug Ash responded with a grunt and gasp for air before wrapping his own arms around Max. For a few more minutes Max sobbed uncontrollably, repeating “holy shit, holy motherfucking shit” as he crushed Ash in his embrace, with Ash returning the favor and tearing up himself after a bit.

Finally Max stepped back, hands on Ash's shoulders as if he were afraid that losing physical contact with him would cause him to disappear, his face bright red and eyes bloodshot from shock and emotions.

“H—how?” Max finally asked dryly, voice cracking, before his coherency returned further and his head snapped toward Sing. “And _you_ – did you know about this??”

Sing's face was flushed, guilty. “I helped.”

Max turned to Eiji then, hands still gripping Ash's shoulders. “When did you find out?”

“He came to the gallery a few nights ago, just after we put up the last photos,” Eiji said. “We've been sorting out who to tell... and decided we'd only tell you, and Ibe-san when we go back to Japan.”

“Japan?” Max turned to Ash then. “The... ticket?”

Ash nodded. “Yeah. Been there since about a month after I checked out of being Ash Lynx.”

Max blinked at that. “What?”

“Michael Paul Blanca, Japan stock-market wrangler and full-time hermit, at your service,” Ash said with a smirk. “I used Golzine's money to start over. If you've tried to find out anything about Ash Lynx in the last seven years, you've probably had a pretty hard time if it wasn't physical evidence. I guess you could say I pretty much hacked my way into the witness protection program.”

“After faking your own death,” Max said, finally sitting down when the shock caught up to him and he started trembling; he reached for and downed the beer he'd been sipping on in one long draught. “Which... I need to know how the hell you pulled this off... though... I'll be honest, I'm really not as surprised as I should be.”

“That's what Eiji said too,” Ash said in an exaggerated, feigned puzzled tone. “But to be honest, he wasn't as freaked out as you were.”

“That's because Eiji's acted like you weren't really gone all this time,” Max said. “We were starting to worry about him.”

Eiji shrugged nonchalantly. “I always told you my soul was with him. I guess it was just reporting the truth back to me, and I didn't know it.”

“I'm gonna need food and more beer to absorb all this. At least we have a story to go over during dinner,” Max said.

“And that would be my cue,” Eiji laughed. “I'll get the okonomiyaki started, and we can all get caught up.”

  
  


The dinner and conversation lasted until past midnight, with Max promising, as difficult as it would be, to keep Eiji and Ash's secret even though he knew that Jessica and especially Michael would have loved to know. He was finally placated by a promise that perhaps, at some point when things were more settled and Eiji was comfortable with doing so, that Ash would reveal his secret to them, perhaps when the pair visited California. Until then, Max would tell them the story that Eiji had created of Michael being a friend he'd met in the art and photography community in New York City.

Once their company had taken their leave Eiji and Ash fell into bed with Buddy curled at their feet, the dog keeping close as he was skittish of the thunder that accompanied what was forecast to be the last of the storms. For a while the pair laughed as they discussed the night's events, with Ash more than amused at how little Max had changed. As their conversation wound down to a drowsy pause, with both of them considering sleep, Eiji's words nudged Ash out of his light doze.

“So do you really just want to be a hermit?” Eiji asked. “I know you can work from home, but you shouldn't hide forever. You don't have to anymore.”

Ash smirked, propping his head on his hand. “I've kinda wanted to do something recently, but I don't know if it would work out, being a gaijin and all.”

“What's that?”

“I kind of love the whole izakaya atmosphere. The regulars, the almost... family-like? feel to it. You go to the same one, and when you walk in everyone greets you, everyone knows you. A few of the people I talked to said they feel like their favorite izakaya is like another home to them. It kind of makes me want to open one. But I'm sure I wouldn't be trusted to do it right. There's a chain of them that I looked into maybe buying a franchise location for, but my favorite ones are the little privately-owned holes in the wall. Where they serve maybe five snacks, three types of beer and highballs, where maybe 10-15 people can fit inside. I don't know, it's just a pipe dream. There's so many of them as it is. But... something about it just appeals to me.”

Eiji's grin had spread wider as he listened. “I found a few corner bars around here that were kind of like that. Of course the atmosphere is different, but that feeling of home, where people recognize you, is still pretty universal. I wasn't old enough to get into izakayas when I left Japan. Well, just barely, but I never did because I was an athlete. Let's do some research when we get back... because you do have a Japanese partner in... crime? Should we still use that?”

Ash snortlaughed at that. “In the literal sense, definitely not. But I'm sure a hip, super-cute bartender who can cook a mean Japanese appetizer would attract some customers. Maybe some research is warranted after all.” He reached over then to drape an arm over Eiji's shoulder's lazily, which Eiji returned.

“When were you thinking about going back?” Eiji asked as he moved in closer, his body fitting against Ash's comfortably, his arm drawing him more snug against the other's body.

“Well, I know you have your exhibition going on. We can always wait till that's over.”

“I've got three more weeks. If they ask to extend it again, I'll decline. But that will also give me enough time to get Buddy up to date on everything and make plans for being away. I can also start getting Ibe-san used to my having a partner when I talk with him, so it won't be like I'm randomly bringing someone home with me. I'm sure he'll be just as freaked out as Max was at first, but I think he will be happy too.” Eiji's expression slipped into a melancholy one then, prompting Ash to give his back an encouraging pat to continue.

“When the plane was taking off that day and I felt what I thought was your death, before we heard... Ibe-san promised me we'd come back to see you once I was healed. He said to me that you were the best friend I'd ever had, and he was right. He just didn't know that it went beyond that. Maybe I didn't even realize it then. But losing you is what made me understand just how deep my love for you went... and the worst part about it was that I never got to tell you. Maybe that's what kept me holding on for so long... the regret.”

“Well, I know now,” Ash said softly. “And trust me, my biggest regret was leaving you behind. But I knew it would take some time before it would ever be safe for me to come back to you, if I ever did. I honestly wasn't sure if erasing my existence and starting over would work... but it seems it has. As long as Max and Sing remain true to their word, which I know they will... you'll be safe.”

“ _We'll_ be safe,” Eiji said. “Even if there were any people who knew who you were that are left, who would really care now? Your part in everything is over. You're dead to anyone that is left from that time.”

“I know. I guess I'm just never completely able to relax. It's probably always going to be there.”

“It won't be needed in Japan,” Eiji said. “That's why our next step is for both of us to go back home.”

Ash smiled sleepily at that, hugging Eiji closer. “I have home right here in my arms. But yes... home.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! :) I'll be wrapping this up with the next chapter, see you then.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _This is it. You have your dream, Ash. A normal life. Here, in Japan, just like I told you it could be. Just like I wanted for you... for us._

**Six Weeks Later – Tokyo, Japan**

<“I've heard of people who go into hiding that way, but it's usually with the cooperation of the police. But honestly, my surprise was only from seeing you alive again, Ash, because I never thought it would happen. But if anyone could have done this and pulled it off, it would be you.”>

To Ash and Eiji's surprise, Ibe's initial reaction to finding out the true identity of Eiji's new companion Michael had not been as dramatic as Max's. He'd turned pale as a sheet, surely, but he'd only reeled for all of three or four minutes before coming to his senses and bursting into hysterical laughter for another five before calming down and busting out a bottle of his best Japanese whiskey for the three of them. Upon learning that Ash spoke quite fluent Japanese, the trio had continued in that language as Ibe, having been back in Japan full time for so long had not used English as much, prompting Ash to insist out of respect.

<“You know... when Max told me they never found a body, in the back of my head, I wondered,”> Ibe continued. <“The first time everyone thought you were dead, it was because others had faked it for you, and you used that to your advantage. So, why wouldn't you try it again? I'm honestly surprised no one else thought of this.”>

<“I gave Sing the money buy me a laptop straight away while I was still healing up,”> Ash replied. <“I started working on erasing my identity slowly, so no one would notice. The first thing I did was change anything I found that said I was still alive to my date of death. One, two things per day, at a pace that it would get done normally. I used my connections to get a new passport and papers to head overseas with Sing's help. He said his friend Michael needed a cover and did a lot of work for me. I couldn't have done the beginning stuff without him. It helped that Eiji's ticket was in his name and open-ended, though I could have bought a new one with my new identity if I'd needed to. So Eiji helped me as well, in a way.”> He smiled softly over at Eiji, who returned it warmly.

<“Well, I will work very hard at calling you Michael, until I even call you it in front of just myself and Eiji. I don't want to make a mistake,”> Ibe said with a smirk of his own. <“What are your plans, now that you're back?”>

<“Well, right now I've got my work from home job, but Eiji is going to help me research an idea I've had for a bit. I don't want to jinx it, so I'll keep it under my hat for the moment. Going to New York was a test to see if being out in the open would work. Granted, a lot of the people that would have possibly recognized me were gone or I didn't attempt to see. I knew it was a bit of a risk to reveal myself to Max, but I'm convinced I can trust him.”>

<“I've been calling him a vampire, because he only goes out at night,”> Eiji added, <“But I think he is safe now, enough to maybe work on our idea. Which... would still involve being out at night, when I think about it.”>

<“Yes, but in a good way,”> Ash replied. <“If everything goes according to plan, I think we will have a good life here.”>

<“And what about your work, Eiji-san?”> Ibe said.

<“I have a lot of freelance contacts here. Newspapers, magazines. When I put out word I was going to be back I got 10 offers for work. I'll be fine.”>

<“He doesn't have to work at all, I've told him that,”> Ash said. <“But he's passionate about his photography, and I won't take that from him. It's what makes him who he is... and part of what I... what I love about him.”>

Ibe paused at that, blinking a few times as he made sure he'd heard Ash's Japanese words correctly. <“Maybe it's because you are translating from how you would say it in English, or the way it's said in America, but... to use _ai_ as you are using it... it's not something that's done very lightly. Sometimes even family doesn't say it that way.” >

Ash reached over to where Eiji's hand had just set down his glass after finishing the ginger highball Ibe had made him; in turn, Eiji reached over and the pair entwined their fingers, with Ash giving Eiji's hand an affirmative squeeze.

<“Eiji explained that to me... but you'd best believe this gaijin knows exactly what he's talking about,”> Ash responded with a grin, while Eiji's cheeks flushed over to accompany his own soft smile.

Ibe grinned in return, then raised his own glass. <“That is the other thing that doesn't surprise me at all,”> he replied.

  
  


**Two Weeks Later**

Eiji's favorite time of day on in the spacious condo Ash owned in the Shibuya area of Tokyo was what was often called the “blue hours” at dawn and dusk. The light between the time just before the sun's rising or after the sun's setting very often turned the spectacular view of the city from their 20 th floor, floor-to-ceiling living room windows a deep azure that made the brightly-colored neon lights and digital screens on the buildings, especially those at the well-known crosswalk, stand out vibrantly.

The sun had just set, and Eiji was relaxing with a cup of tea, Buddy at his feet as he sat curled on the couch enjoying the view. Ash was in his office, still working after his normal hours as he usually did. They'd only been in Tokyo together a short time, but it was leading Eiji to see the city he'd adopted after moving there for university from his rural Japanese suburb in an entirely new light, both figuratively and literally.

The hue of the canvas spread out before him turned a deeper shade close to indigo, darkness beginning to shroud the city as he realized that even while there for university he'd always lived in a tiny space, be it a dormitory or eventually, the tiny apartment he'd shared with two other roommates just off campus. The only time he'd ever seen the city from on high like this was from an airplane – and the first time he was ever on one, it had taken him to New York City with Ibe. There was one common denominator between that time and now – both times, a young man named Ash had changed his life forever.

He'd only just begun accepting the fact, seven years on, that Ash was gone, and ended up not needing to. It had been a whirlwind, to be sure, and just like the first time he had to pinch himself to check if what was happening was real at times (except this time was considerably less dramatic and dangerous, obviously). When they'd arrived, he'd insisted that they go to Sens ō-ji Temple in the Asakusa ward of Tokyo together, to pray for protection and peace in their new life together. He'd been surprised when Ash said he'd been there a lot, usually later at night when it was the most quiet, and that he'd found a measure of peace there. Eiji had begun to understand now how Ash had felt upon coming here alone all those years ago; despite the fact that they knew they were safe, the feeling that their hard-won peace could be snatched away at any moment had begun to plague Eiji just a bit. Ash had said he'd like to continue his weekly nighttime visits to the Temple, and Eiji had decided that a periodic chat with the gods couldn't hurt.

As the sky turned deep midnight blue, the city now just a sea of lights below, Eiji noticed the time and realized Ash hadn't emerged from his office yet. Knowing what was probably up he rose, heading down the hallway to the room at the end with a big picture window that shared the same view as the living room on one side. Peering into the open door he found Ash in the darkened room, the monitor on the computer having gone into sleep mode and Ash fast asleep with his head on the desk. It happened more often than not; Ash tended to wake with the dawn and after immersing himself in work for the greater part of the day, would always end up falling asleep at his desk.

Eiji paused for a moment, smiling at how in just two short weeks, their lives were already settling into a routine. Today Eiji had been home, but on the days he worked late on an assignment there was a good chance he'd still come home to a sleepy Ash that had either just woken up from his desk-nap, or been awakened by Eiji, as he would be now.

_This is it. You have your dream, Ash. A normal life. Here, in Japan, just like I told you it could be. Just like I wanted for you... for us._

Eiji broke into a warm grin and stepped into the room to give Ash's shoulder a gentle shake. After all, it was time for dinner, and he needed to know what Ash had a taste for tonight.

  
  


**Eighteen Months Later**

“What are you laughing about?”

Ash was standing just inside the entry of the dimly-lit izakaya, keeping an eye on the clock. It was 17:50 – ten minutes to 6 pm, Tokyo's dinner hour for most businesses – and the four men who had taken to stopping in on their way home from work each day during the week were already waiting outside the door, like clockwork. It was the same during lunch hour; there was always a group of regulars that would stop in, usually from the businesses immediately nearby. But the evening always provided those salarymen who had just piled off the trains at Shibuya Station and were ready to have a drink to take the edge off another rough day at the office before heading home for the night.

“I swear I can tell if the trains are running late by these guys,” Ash laughed. “They walk up to the door at the same time every day. Better get those four orders of yakitori going.”

“The grill's just about warmed up, I'll get them started,” Eiji grinned. “And I'll set out their glasses.”

“Might as well pour the drinks too,” Ash replied.

“No, they'll want them to be fresh. Which is your job,” he reminded him with a smile.

“I guess that was the only part I got wrong about this whole thing. I forgot you're the better cook,” Ash grinned as he greeted their three other employees as they emerged from the back, ready to welcome their regular customers; the first group that waited outside at 6 pm sharp, the rest within the half hour to follow. The remainder of the evening would be a mix of regulars, randoms and tourists, and as a result after 7 pm no two nights were ever the same.

Ash came around behind the bar, looking over through the pass through window where Eiji would place the finished dishes just as the sizzle of the first batch of yakitori hitting the grill filled the room with the sounds of the evening. The tiny place had once been a restaurant that the owner had, ironically, tried to do a New York style deli in that had ended up going under (which made Ash and Eiji immediately decide that this just _had_ to be the place. It fit with their whole starting over from New York thing, anyway). Sandwiched in between buildings in a busy alley a city block down from the center of Shibuya, word had spread quickly when the new izakaya had opened. In just about four months business went from steady, to booming, and hadn't looked back since.

As soon as the hostess opened the doors at 6 pm the four men that had been waiting outside came in and sat at their usual table. The server took their order as a matter of formality; they always ordered the exact same thing. But at Eiji's insistence, Ash – or Michael-san, as the patrons knew him – waited to see the order, just in case someone had changed their mind (they hadn't). He mixed up the two highballs, poured the single sake and the beer; almost the second after they'd come to rest on the tray, the server whisked it off to the table. It was the same, every night. There were only a few minutes between the serving of the food and the rest of the evening rush, setting off another busy evening.

It was about as far away from his old life as Ash had ever been. And he wouldn't have it any other way.

  
  


Ash flopped on the bed with a groan, happy it was still mid-week which meant their izakaya closed at 10 pm. Fridays and Saturdays would see them not getting home until 4 am or later, but they were the most fun nights of the week for sure. He checked his phone quickly to see what was on his work from home agenda for the morning, but set it down as Eiji came into the room and crawled into bed with a heavy sigh of his own.

“Tonight was good. We're seeing even more people coming in. We might have to start staying open later on the weeknights too, maybe hire a couple more people,” Eiji said. “Which isn't a bad thing. It's hard to keep an izakaya running since there's so many of them.”

“We're lucky we got the location we did,” Ash said. “I think that made all the difference. We're right near a hotel too.”

“That's the other thing. Foreign tourists are always happy to find someone who speaks English. I looked our place up on Yelp, and everyone that visits from elsewhere always mentions the English-speaking bartender,” Eiji said with a smile.

“You speak it too though,” Ash said.

“True, but it's also nice to see a “familiar” face. I felt the same when I was in New York the first time. I was used to living in a place where everyone looked like me, but there it was different. When I did go home to Japan before I turned right back around I did realize I missed the familiarity of the people and of home.”

“So you're saying it's because we're gaijin-friendly,” Ash laughed. “Well I guess that would be an advantage.”

Eiji laughed as well. “Well yes, but you say that like it's a bad thing.”

“You know how I am about being careful about stepping on other people's toes,” Ash said. “I guess it's something I'll never really stop worrying about.”

“I don't think we're going to cause any place to go out of business any time soon,” Eiji laughed. “We're fine. You're fine. When you've taken the time to learn Japanese, and our way of life, you gain respect. That's another reason all our customers love you.”

“I'm glad I've met all the requirements, it took me long enough,” Ash smiled, draping an arm over Eiji, prompting the other man to move in and snuggle into the offered embrace.

“I told you that you'd be at peace here, even back then. And now you've learned it for yourself.”

Ash nodded quietly. “I never thought it was possible. I thought having a life of peace like Blanca did was a pipe dream for someone like me even though he offered me the chance. Maybe I turned him down because it wasn't the life I wanted, or who I wanted it with. And in the meantime, you put yourself in a more dangerous place. I'm glad you decided to come back here for good. Neither of us need New York anymore.”

Eiji smiled softly at that. “No... I held onto New York because it was all I had left of you. It had its good and bad things. But now... I am happy, because I am where I belong, and I'm here with whom I belong.”

Ash's green eyes caught that familiar sparkle that Eiji knew meant he'd gotten a bit emotional. Even after a year and a half after starting over – Ash liked to call it “the resurrection” with a wink and smirk – Eiji knew that there were times Ash still had his moments of pause regarding how far they'd come together in building their new life. He took great satisfaction in the knowledge that Ash no longer had to hide his feelings, to stay strong in the face of danger to be a leader that others respected and looked to. It had been a world he'd never have taken on if he'd had the choice, but he'd done so for survival. But now, all their survival depended on was making sure the izakaya was fully stocked on a Friday night, lest their customers cause a riot. The thought made Eiji smile absently as he nuzzled into Ash's shoulder.

“What's so funny?” Ash asked, his voice soft as he edged closer to slumber.

“Nothing,” Eiji replied as he tipped his head back to meet Ash's eyes. “I'm just happy.”

Even sleepy, Ash's little smirk was rakishly handsome. “So am I.” He then leaned forward a bit, just enough to place a soft kiss on Eiji's lips, which was returned in kind. Eiji had been caught off guard the first time Ash had done it, when he'd been overcome with emotion in the moments of happiness when his little dream of opening the izakaya became reality. Eiji asked no more, nor took it for granted. After all, true to his word he would never expect more of Ash than he was willing to give, and whatever he did feel strong enough to offer would always be the greatest gift Eiji would ever receive.

“Rest well, Ash,” Eiji murmured.

“Sleep tight, Eiji,” Ash whispered.

And just like every night since the first they'd spent together in Japan, they drifted off with arms snug about each other and Buddy curled at their feet, their lives and their world finally, truly at peace.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap! Thank you to everyone who took the time to read, comment, kudo and bookmark this little fic that refused to stay a one-chapter one-shot. I'm glad my little fix-it fic has made so many people happy. :)


	6. A Little Bonus: Companion Artwork

I just finished this art today, and wanted to add it here. This is how I picture Ash and Eiji in the story; this is from the scene in Ibe's apartment. He wanted to take a photo of them together (which Ash made him swear to never show anyone, just in case). They do both wear glasses, but they took them off for the photo.

Thanks so much again to everyone who's taken the time to read this fic. :)

  

**Author's Note:**

> This story, which was originally intended to be a single chapter one-shot, came to me by way of a coping mechanism after reading the Banana Fish manga and being punched squarely in the gut multiple times by the way it ended, as well as by the epilogue story "Garden of Light". I will choose to believe this is how it ended and you will not change my mind, lol.
> 
> Many thanks to @yuurinikifor0v for listening to my brainstorming session. :)
> 
> @butleronduty on Twitter did this art that was inspired by Ash's look in this fic, please go give it lots of love [here!](https://twitter.com/butleronduty/status/1042786988787552257) Thank you so much <333
> 
> The title of this story is taken from the first verse of the song that inspired it in part, [Time Marches On](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwQuI4v9rcc) by David Cook.
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> * * *
> 
> Find me @AslanKatsuki on Twitter and @HuntressFirefall on Tumblr.


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